Seven

This week marks seven years since I moved back home again to Indiana.  I moved the last weekend in March 2003.  We loaded up the Ryder truck in Tulsa and headed east.  Three of my co-workers caravanned with me.  I drove the Ryder truck; Harold drove my red Isuzu Rodeo; Gail and Pam in Gail's van.  It was a long drive and we arrived about dark.  We spent the night at Mom and Dad's and then began unpacking the next morning.  We got it all unloaded pretty quickly, and then spent the rest of the time unpacking the boxes.  By the last day, we had dishes unpacked, a stocked linen closet, and blinds installed.  As my friends drove away back to Tulsa, I wondered, "What the hell have I done?"  I was really sad and a little panicked to see Gail's van heading back west.

I had no internet connection, except dial-up, and somehow I was going to telecommute from home.  I contacted a cousin who lives 25 miles away.  I was able to hook up to her system and worked there for a few weeks.  Then an old friend in town had cable internet, and I borrowed hers for another couple of weeks.  I finally got a satellite dish installed and was up and running. 

I thought I would get some remodeling done on the house, but just a few months later, in June, Mom fell and shattered her shoulder, ending her days of driving, for the most part.  We've been off to the races ever since.  I got thrown into the deep end of the elder care pool. 

When I first had the idea of moving back home, I knew that no blood relatives on either side of the family lived to see ninety.  Mom was 86, Dad was 85.  I wanted to spend time with my folks before they passed so that I wouldn't have any regrets later.  I figured it would be 2-3 years tops.  Mom had dementia; Dad was legally blind and had a heart condition.  Well, they sure surprised me when they both celebrated their 90th birthdays and their 60th wedding anniversary.

I started blogging back in the summer of 2005.  It has given me a venue to document the crazy things that have happened around me since I moved back.  Most locals around here don't realize that they live a life that few in the world ever get to see.  Even I have to remember to once in a while get out the camera, take a photo of the farm scenery, and write a blog post about it.

Dad has been a wealth of material here on the blog.  I don't know many farmers still driving farm equipment and climbing roofs at the age of 90.  It's sad to see him the way he is now.  But I try to remember him taking on some project and laughing at how it turned out.  He was always very determined and headstrong; and still is today.

Chances are this will be my last year in Indiana.  I plan to stay here in Indiana until my Dad passes on.  My work is getting really anxious for me to relocate to Houston.  They have been extremely generous to allow me to telecommute for this many years.  Most people don't get to spend this kind of quality time with their elderly parents.  I do realize how fortunate I have been. 

Comments

[cliff]

I hereby dub you the 'good son.' You are a prince for doing what you've done Jerry. I was struck with a little bit of melancholy when yous said you were going to Houston but I guess our paths have more of a chance of crossing if you're there as opposed to where you're at now.
Stay strong. c

[Teresa]

I know you are very happy with the memories of the last few years at home with your parents. Even though the inevitable end is sad.

You are a terrific person. And you work for some terrific people.

[Yabu]

Good on you.

Cool Runnings!!

[Scott]

I hope that you will look back on your time "Back Home Again" with no regrets. Doing what you have for your parents is the right thing to do, and I hope you feel that it was an honor to do it. Maybe someday, when you need some help when you are older, someone will do the same for you. You must work for a good company that will allow you to work away from their headquarters. Hang in there with your Dad. I've enjoyed reading the stories about him the last few years.

[Nora]

You are a good son, brother, uncle and friend. I've loved every minute that you've been in Indiana but understand the need to get back to your life.

[Diane Richardson Killion]

I grew up on a 25 acre farm. I started driving a tractor in the field when I was probably about 10 years old. My mom sold the farm in 2000, one year after my dad passed away. I took photos of the entire property from different angles. Until I got married, that was the only place I had ever lived. I miss the farm more than I ever imagined. I took it for granted when my parents lived there. My daughter planted a tree there that she received at school when she was in 2nd grade (she is 26 now.) After my dad's funeral, we replanted a tree that had come up volunteer in the fence row. It was set near my daughter's tree. All that had to be left behind when the farm was sold. I really miss my dad. He was only 72. I know it is bittersweet for you to take care of your dad knowing he will be gone some day. You are a good son to take care of your parents. Thanks for sharing your blog.